okay blogging all early right now.. hehe.. my day hasn't even started yet and i already have some stuff to write.. that's pretty dang fantastic of me.. well let's see i wasn't planning on going to practice this morning cuz well basically i didn't have a ride to get wehre i needed to be.. so my friend calls me this morning and tells me i'm going to get picked up.. i'm like awwright [jason's style, hehe] so i go and put on some pants.. a decent shirt.. and i go wait outside.. and so she comes.. and mind you that my practice starts at 7:30 in the morning.. and why is it the laggers that we are they just barely come to pick me up at like 7:35.. ofcourse.. that's Hoover for ya... so we're about to go pick up our friend melissa.. and she lives all the way in butt freak egypt from where we all live.. and ofcourse being the melissa that she is.. she gives us the wrong directions.. and being that there are three girls in one car nobody really knew where we were going.. so me.. skarlet.. and frances are sitting there deciding whether or not we should take east or west.. or north or south.. my gosh we freakin' took a tour.. we went from pasadena to burbank back to glendale back to burbank.. i dunno where we ended up cuz i fell asleep at some portions of it.. all i know is we were not anywhere near melissa's house.. apparently it's 5 south.. and then take 2 NORTH.. melissa left out the minor detail of taking 2 NORTH... hmm.. what a melissa.. so we finally find our way and we pick her up and it's already umm let's check the time.. umm 8:15.. excuse me but our practice ends at like 9! so we're like sitting there in skarlet's car deciding whether or not we should still attend the practice.. or we should all just go home.. which isn't too difficult fo rmelissa since she's already home... so we're sitting around.. and i mean with skarlet's car.. hehe.. it'll take us half an hour to get from mel's house to the gym where we need to be.. so we figure.. ehh screw practice.. which really sucks cuz for each class we pay 10 bucks.. so that's 10 dollars down the drain.. grr.. i hate wasting money.. so we're sitting in skarlet's car for like 20 years.. it's like 4 girls randomly sitting in a car but whatevers.. so afterwards we all decide that we're hungry.. and well me and melissa had zippo cash.. so melissa suggests just going in her house to eat breakfast.. so we do just that.. we have waffles and eggs and rice.. and filipino ketchup! hehe.. and there was some soy sauce on the rice.. cuz ya know we desperately wanted to eat something.. i ate my waffles with syrup and cream cheese.. yumMm.. don't hate mayn that's good.. it's a mixture of sweet and sour.. a good combo right there.. i also realized that i got over my fear of doggies.. cuz like i was able to handle melissa's 2 dogs.. Pepper and Dutches.. i actually pet them and stuff.. so yay for me.. but don't get me wrong i still despise chihuahuas.. well anyways.. you know how sometimes you just have a GOOD convo with a good group of friends.. wow that was how it was today.. it was a GOOD convo.. there were laughs and there were even tears.. yes Mel, it's alrite.. hehe i understand how you feel.. but seriously i had a good convo with my friends this morning.. that's an awesome way to start a day.. our convo was basically about religion and GOD and our experiences.. so you would understand why some tears were shed.. mayn.. GOD is a beautiful thing to bring 4 people together in a way that they never came together before.. =) i really needed this toO.. so hopefully today is a good day.. and if it isn't you know what i'm okay with that cuz that's how GOD wanted it.. and i can't argue with that.. (( smiles ))

you know what they say.. it's a lot harder to praise GOD when you're going through "trials and tribulations"... it's funny how when you're facing trials in your life the harder it is to turn to him.. when it should actually be easier.. why is that? i was sitting at home.. and i just started praying.. and i was compelled to write a portion of my prayer on here.. the parts i remembered atleast...

LORD GOD, i praise and glorify your name at this moment.. although right now it is so easy for me to turn away from you and just hide away from you, but i know that is not the answer. Thank you LORD Jesus Christ for this week and everything that went along with this week, because i know there are good reasons for the things happening this week. Thank you LORD GOD for the event with my dad, because i know that you allowed it to happen only because you love me. Thank you LORD GOD for the friendships that were changed this week whether for the good or the bad, because you're reasons for this allowing to happen are greater than we can ever be. Thank you LORD GOD for the heartache that we are feeling, because it will teach us learn a better appreciation for something new, and something different. Thank you LORD GOD for the hurtful words that were said, because you allowed them to be said, therefore we understand that they are necessary. LORD JESUS CHRIST right now at this moment i ask for knowledge. Knowledge to be able to understand that YOU have reasons for making things happen. Knowledge to understand the feelings of others, and be able to sympathize with what others are feeling. I ask for strength. Strength to endure the trial that is laid before me. LORD JESUS CHRIST, most importantly, i ask that you help me in my life to be more of YOU. Help me LORD GOD, love like you would, because at this moment that is so difficult for me to do. LORD JESUS CHRIST i pray for my friends and family. May they also be granted the strength and knowledge that they need to survive in their everyday lives. May they be blessed to have YOU in their lives. LORD JESUS CHRIST if i can't be there for a friend, i ask that he may realize YOU are there for him. LORD JESUS CHRIST i pray that he has the courage that he needs to stand up through this trial. LORD JESUS CHRIST through this week alone i realize that the things in life aren't forever. But, i know you have a reason for not allowing forever to exist in our world. LORD JESUS CHRIST help me, and others, learn to cherish the gift of life you have given us. LORD GOD, i ask for guidance not only for myself, but for those around me who are lost in their lives. LORD GOD help steer us in the direction that is closer to YOU. I love you LORD GOD, and this i pray in your most holy name.. AMEN.

Take the "What *NSYNC Hairstyle are you?" Quiz

that's pretty daym terrific! As long as i'm not Justin's fro.. or Chris's dreads.. i'm gOod

you know i've been pondering decisions right now and trying to decide between one or the other.. but now i suddenly realized that wait a sec.. it shouldn't be that hard to decide what you want.. cuz if you really want it.. it should come to you just like that.. and the fact that i'm thinking soo much about it proves that i don't want any of it.. this problem came with such a big price for me.. i lost a best friend.. and i don't know what else i'm gonna lose.. i'm tired of trying to be the nice one and caring about everyone else's feelings.. cuz ya know what caring about everyone else seriously screwed me over.. it's funny how i put family and friends and other things before boys.. but boys always demand the MOST attention.. why is that?!?! i never wanted to hurt anyone.. but sometimes i guess you just can't help what you gotta do.. i'm so sorry.. but sometimes when you can't handle certain situations.. and you just dont know what to do anymore leaving it is the best remedy.. and the best way for me to help myself out and helping those other people out is leaving.. though the good points of this action may not be visible at the moment.. it's there.. it's just not visible right now.. i am hurt.. i am hurt becuase i had to pay such a huge price for this whole thing.. i lost a bestfriend.. but you know what.. that's okay.. cuz that bestfriend of mine will always be in my heart.. i will cherish what me and him had.. and i will never forget him as my bestfriend.. sometimes when a person leaves your life it's hard to comprehend why they did.. or ask questions like when are they coming back.. but you know it's better to remember what was there instead of being sad about what is now gone.. all i gotta say is.. nothing lasts forever... that can be lOoked at as a good thing or a bad thing.. but in the end of everythign and you lOok back there will always be moments where you smile and remember.. and that's what i keep in my heart.. the moments where i look back and smile.. i'm also hurting.. i'm not coming out of this without any scratches.. but sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do in life even if it hurts... nothing lasts forever

. on a lighter note .
CONGRATULATIONS TO ALL THOSE WHO WERE CONFIRMED..
hovsep-love, awesome speech, thanks for the talk also..

hahahhaa.. i found this so freakin' funny!! i'm freakin osama bin laden..i never would have imagined me.. osama?! well internet quizzes don't lie! hehehe

WHAT A DAY !! omg.. what a life lesson today was.. okay so first off i was supposed to meet freda at like 9:30 in the morning at burger king.. cuz we felt like eating some breakfast.. but why is it.. being the katrina that i am i woke up all late like 10.. and i was like awww shOot cakes.. and so i go and i jog to freakin' burger king and i get there a half an hour or so after 10.. but it was all good.. =) so anyways.. afterwards we go to the mall cuz ya know.. we needed to shop.. and i vent my problems out on shopping.. so i went on a shopping extravaganza.. yah well i spent a pretty hefty load.. probably more than i should have... so afterwards we saw margie and stuff.. and freda wanted to go to burbank cuz her shopping extravaganza wasn't finished yet.. me and freda planned on taking the metro but margie offered us a ride.. so we were like yay for margie! and then afterwards we were walking around and we hung out and talked and talked and talked and talked and talked.. ofcourse.. what else would freda and i do ? besides eat also.. so yah afterwards we realized that it was getting all late and stuff so we tOok the metro.. problem was we weren't very sure which one to take.. so we took the first one that came along.. haha okay wait let me rephrase that.. we tOok the one that had the right number on it.. so yah we toOk it and me and freda are talking and then all of a sudden we realized that we were not seeing anything familiar to us.. and so we asked the bus driver where we were at and he straight said.. "sun valley, sylmar" omg.. from then and on freda and i were tripping! so the bus driver person to told us to get off on the next stop and go across the street cuz that one will take us back to glendale.. we were like aah! okay so we do just that.. and mayn we were in the bOonies okay.. like really ghetto bOonie ass bOonies.. so we were all scared.. and like our bus was not coming whatsoever.. and like things started creeping us out.. and like the bus comes.. and we ask.. this time WE ASK if it was gonna take us to glendale.. and he said no! we were like oooh shOot.. what the heck are we gonna do now ?!?!?! so we get all scared.. and we started praying and stuff.. and soon after it's like.. the bus comes but it said a different number again.. but get this.. it was the same bus driver from the first wrong bus that we took.. so mayn it was a relief to see him cuz it was like he knew where were trying to go and stuff.. so it was just such a relief to see a familiar face also.. so mayn.. our prayers were answered plus a special bonus! mayn it was great.. and he reassured us that he was going to glendale and that he was the bus to go home and stuff.. wOo hOo.. PRAISE GOD! i can't thank GOD enough for blessing us with that man... what a day what a day.. well freda and i asked for an adventure.. and we got it.. be careful what you ask for.. you just might get it..

i'm using this blogging thing as my means of venting all my problems out.. specifically a certain area of my lifes problems.. i can't believe the weird things that are happening in my life right now.. my life has seriously been thrown through a lOop.. i don't know how to handle things anymore.. even when i think i am handling things the words i want to use isn't getting across.. i've met a lot of jerky ass guys in my life.. why can't the guys i'm dealing with now be just as jerky as those past guys ?! all the guys i have to deal with now are all super-duper nice. they treat me well.. they do everything they can for me.. how am i supposed to make a decision based on that?! i dunno what to do.. it would be a lot easier if someone just told me what i'm supposed to do.. but i know nobody can tell me that right now.. i don't know.. i seriously don't know where my head and heart is at right now.. why did i chOose to be open minded?! open mindedness screwed me over.. BIG TIME! i was doing fine being my anti-boy self.. i was doing pretty gosh darn dandy.. and then all of a sudden i had to go and have an epiphany and think i should give the whole "boy" thing a chance.. screw that idea! that was the stupidest idea i have ever had in my life! i don't get myself sometimes.. i've had jerky guys before.. i couldn't deal with them.. now i have some nice guys and i dunno what i'm supposed to do with them.. can't people throw themselves one at a freakin' time?!?!?! it would be a lot easier.. there has been so many surprises in my life right now.. you guys don't even know the half of it.. i've decided to temporarily step away from this problem/situation.. i guess you can say that yes, i am running away from my problems.. i just need a break from this whole "thinking" thing.. i don't like it.. i need a break.. i need to just chill for awhile.. i haven't had that for awhile.. everything has required me to think about what i'm doing.. and i hate doing that.. i don't like to think! why can't guys stay the jerks they normally are! they'd be alot easier to deal with... i don't have to feel so daym guilty about telling the guy to shove off.. in all seriousness to those people.. i'm so sorry if i confused you or am in the process of confusing.. i'm sorry that i have been so unclear in my words and feelings.. cuz apparently i haven't figured them out myself.. i need time to myself basically.. and yes that means i am asking for space fo rme to figure things out.. space.. what a word.. what a gorgeous word.. i haven't had that for awhile.. space = a time to think, a time by myself, a time to may be figure things out.. i don't like running away from my problems.. but as of right now that's the only thing i can do.. that's the only good remedy that i have right now.. i acknowledge full well that the problem will not go away just cuz i decided to go away from it.. but you know what.. maybe it will go away.. maybe they will decide to give up on me and forget it.. hMm.. you think it will happen?! hey it's a possibility i can deal with that.. ugh.. i need to figure things out seriously... i need a break from thinking.. a BIG BREAK! bigger break than a kit kat bar! hehe.. corny right there.. hey i had to smile about something.. =/

. something special .
also.. i wanna say thanks to that one person who made me that wonderful picnic on my rOof.. that was honestly very beautiful and i did love it.. it's not that i didn't appreciate what you did for me.. that was great.. and nobody has ever done that for me before.. i don't know what i did to deserve someone like that doing something for me.. but honestly thanks.. you truly made me feel like a hundred bucks when you did that! wow.. you made me feel like i was the most special person in the entire world for those couple minutes.. in my most troubled time.. you made me smile.. thank you so much for that.. i will always remember that.. and what you did for me.. i still tear/cry at the thought of you doing that for me.. i'm sorry if things didn't turn out as planned since ya know crap was happening and everything.. but know that even though things didn't turn out as planned that you have truly affected me with those couple minutes up there.. i never would have expected you do that for me.. thank you.. thank you so much.. and like i told you i'm not gonna be gone forever.. just for the time being...

wow.. believe it or not i actually did something today.. i didn't just lay around my house and do absolutely nothing.. yup.. unbelievable huh ?! yah well believe it.. so i wake up at like 12:05 or something to that time.. which is pretty daym early for me.. oh and a friend of mine dropped off something.. you know who you are.. thanks mayn.. that really meant a lot that you did that for me.. i really appreciate it.. =) well so afterwards i hopped in the shower and i got all "dolled" up cuz me and my friend nicole were gonna go to the mall cuz ya know i gotta holler at them hot boys and what not.. haha yah right.. no but so i hopped in the shower after i got semi-ready i called up my friend to come ot my house.. so she came to my house.. we just kicked it for awhile and then we hopped on the beeline.. yup i haven't gotten on the beeline in the longest time.. whoa it was weird.. gosh i felt like such a teeny bOpper.., but anyways.. so we got to the mall.. and we just ate some italian food.. and weirdly enough me and her didn't finish our food.. which is completely weird.. cuz mayn me and her usually eat a whole mess but yah afterwards we didn't stay at the mall a long time.. cuz ya know staying at the mall for long hours just isn't cute.. so we started walking towards the bowling alley place.. cuz me and her felt the need to do some bowling.. hehe it was pretty fun.. who ever said two people going bowling isn't any fun?! it's the best ! i played a pretty gOod game.. we played like 3 games.. and omg.. nicole and i had an audience.. hahaah.. it was funny.. cuz there were like a group of armenian boys like applauding us and what not.. and then a group of armenian girls that like would laugh when we'd miss something.. hMm.. gosh hateration right there! but yah.. it was pretty funny and random.. and me and nicole were like what the heck ?! random armenian boys but anyways so after the boys watch us bowl we decide that it was about time for us to leave.. we walk back to the mall trying to figure out what we want to eat.. cuz ya know ofcourse since we didn't finish our meal earlier we felt the need to eat more fOod.. so we just went to go drink some BoBa at the place in the mall.. and from there we decided to try the "walking around" thing since we didn't really want to go home yet.... hahaha omg.. but wait before that.. hahaha.. so nicole and i were walking.. and then this group of azn boys ( notice i used "azn") taps me on the shoulder and is like.. "do you know what time it is?" i'm like.. oh it's 4:30 without really lOoking at my watch and quickly walk away... but as i'm walking i can hear them giggling and laughing behind us.. and they follow us around for like 5 or so minutes.. geez.. can you be more discrete?! weren't they a slick group.. hahaha.. well me and nicole did something really funny.. we went into limited too.. and we tOok those dumb sticker picture things.. hahaha.. we found it so amusing.. something random we decided to do.. and something we normally we wouldn't do.. they came out whack like most of those things usually do.. and like we kept cracking up cuz like it was just funny.. the whole idea was just funny.. afterwards we decide to head home.. cuz we had enough "hanging out" at the mall.. not feelin spending hours there.. tOo bad though we didn't get to play DDR.. toO bad so sad.. but anyways.. that's all for the day.. pretty exciting huh ?! yah i thought so..

you know what i just realized.. i guess a guy and a girl can't JUST be friends.. it's like no matter how hard i try to make a "buddy" something always screws me over..it's like i can't have a decent guy companion.. that's like JUST a friend.. it always turns into something more.. and i wind up losing someone who i poured out everything to... poured out all my thoughts and feelings to.. someone i can really count on just cuz he realized he wanted to be more than friends.. why can't a person just be satisfied with what is already given to you.. why do people have to make things more complicated then things should be.. why can't people be satisfied with JUST a friendship?!?! i've never been put in the situation i'm currently in right now.. and i can't really right my situation on here.. but yah.. let's just say this is all new to me.. very new.. i'm being pulled into so many directions.. and i don't know whether or not to choose a direction to go to.. or just go on my own way.. the last thing i wanna do is hurt anyone at all through all of this.. but i have a feeling that's all i'm gonna wind up doing.. i don't know how to handle this.. and AAH! my head is starting to hurt from trying to think of this situation.. i seriously think i should just crawl into a box and stay there for awhile.. that is until everything subsides.. and people start forgetting about me.. so many people are asking me so many questions.. and i'm not even really sure how to answer them.. i don't know. .i wish i had answer for them but i seriously DO NOT KNOW!!! i don't know what i'm doing anymore.. and it's like i'm losing complete control of the situation.. i don't like losing control of the situation.. i don't like having to feel guilty for my actions.. i mean why should i? it's hard to realize taht someone you used to be able to tell everything to and confide in has like.. changed perspectives.. and it's like now you gotta be careful about what problems you mention that person.. since you don't want them to get affected.. aah.. sorry i know this probably isn't making a lot of sense to alot of you reading this.. but hey i'm venting.. and i need to vent.. i don't really have anyone to talk to about this yet.. cuz i dunno i want to try and analyze the situation on my own for a little.. i don't like having to hurt people.. i hate that.. i'm one of those types of girls that don't cry when they're the ones that got dumped... but instead i cry cuz i'm the one breaking up with someone.. weird?! yes i know.. but i hate that feeling like you're hurting someone.. it's not a pretty feeling.. i can't feel any weirder about myself and others right now.. my life is mind boggling at the moment.. and it's weird.. cuz like i said it's nothing i've had to deal with before in my life.. it doesn't have to do with family like my life troubles usually deals with.. but get this it's about B O Y S !! yes.. katrina is actually dealing with boy problems.. yeck, hard to believe?! well believe it.. i dunno.. i don't understand why i even chose to be open minded anyways.. why did i do that ? i was going pretty well with the thought in my life that i'm gonna be a nun! and here i go thinking i had to go through life and give a chance and be open minded to certain situations.. why did i do that ? life was good having people think i'm gonna enter a convent.. i feel like shutting the door to open mindedness.. and i don't even see why i ever opened it in the first place.. i am currently.. lost.. confused.. and bewildered [you like that word huh ?! ] that's all for this blog.. and on a light note.. spring break started! whOopdEedOo.. a week of sitting at home doing absolutely nothing! and omg.. people PLEASE STOP THROWING YOURSELVES! I'M TIRED OF PEOPLE THROWING THEMSELVES.. if you were planning on throwing yourself anytime this week.. DON'T! i will sock your face if you do! seriously.. i don't need anymore people throwing themselves.. thanks

omg.. my body is sOooOoOO sore.. i can't even exaggerate enough the feeling my body is feeling.. every muscle.. bone.. ligament.. and tendon in my body is sore ! my ass.. i can't even move around freely.. my body is limited to how much i can move around.. so let me tell you how i woke up this morning.. so i wake up at like close to 4 and mayn i laid there.. and my muscles froze.. i could not move.. and it's a wonder how i got my ass to the computer.. but since i'm an online FREAK i managed to.. i couldn't even get to church today =/ cuz i hopped int he shower.. and i just froze.. it was so hard for me to shampoo my hair.. hard to soap my body.. it's so hard to get around.. mayn.. i'm so like.. AAH hurting ! it's hard to even sneeze.. cuz sneezing sends a rush of pain in my body.. urfz.. but hey i guess ie means i'm getting buff (( flexing )) but mayn wow.. the pain is unbearable.. i'll write more later.. just my physical state right now.. i'll write more about my mental state later...