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here are some tests i saved for jessica.. hehehe have fun! my favorite of the three is the boba one! honeydew boba?! hmm i should try that..

sorry, i'm a vegetarian, i dont' want any beef!
- said by hovsep (( thanks buddy ))

gosh dang why was that quote up there the theme of the day for me?! well yah so i had an ordinary schOol day.. not so very unusual or anything.. then we had cheer practice and that was pretty uMm normal i guess.. and then afterwards robert, nash, and i went to the clark dance.. the "luau" sheesh okay uMm so i'm just in a mood for some hard core fun stuff.. not any ungroovy stuff.. but how come ugh.. dude haterations! gracious.. for goodness sakes since when was simply bumping into a person ACCIDENTALLY a reason to pick a fight with someone.. so let me tell you! gracious.. there's this guy right who think he's a hot boy.. and the place is crowded cuz yaknow it's clark, so yah and then robert accidentally bumps into him, so it's like whatever.. and then all of a sudden this "hot boy" assumes that robert is trying to pick a fight with him.. and so he steps up to robert and starts pushing him.. and i'm off in my own little world and then i take robert aside and i calm him down... cuz you know i don't want him getting into any trouble.. so i just took him in a corner and talked to him and told him to calm down a bit.. and dude how come i did not have a fun time.. and they were playing really good music! mayn! dude! urfz.. no fun! GOSH BEEF LEFT AND RIGHT! and so none of the boys wanted to get up and dance cuz ya know the "beef, tension, and haterations" that was going on.. so ofcourse the boys that they are the "hot boys" just walk around.. and in the end the two boys "patch things up" which is cOol.. how come i tried talking to this "hot boy" like a normal human being, and me and him are just talking cuz i was asking him what happened, and then this other uMm "throw yourself boy" came in between us and said, get this, "forget that B***!" what the heck?! excuse me uMm.. throw yourself out cuz you know what me and him were just talking! gosh dude.. people.. urgh.. whatever.. suck my dick you guy thrower you! anyways yah.. so anywyas moving on so we're all just SITTING literally.. grr.. and then this guy comes up to my friend nicole.. cuz my friend nicole told him to get out of the way cuz some boys were breaking.. and he straight steps up to A GIRL! what a fag huh?! so i butt in cuz im' like what the heck is he doing, he's literally lOoking down at my friend to talk to her and stuff.. so i'm just like "you know what, you should walk away right now cuz you're looking like a complete moron talking to this girl like this.. and what a fag you must lOok to these boys you have around you that you're stepping up to this girl.. she simply told you to move out of the way, or else you would have gotten hit by someone breaking, so would you rather have been cute and gotten hurt, or have her yell at you." well his point was that my friend was just yelling at him, and he thanked me for talking to him like a human being... which was umm.. cool i guess.. all i gotta say is how come i constantly played mediator at this dance.. grr.. and nobody wanted to dance anymore cuz everyone was in such a bad mood and stuff..gracious.. so i just took john, KING MIDAS, and we danced the night away.. hehehe.. harlem shake, uMm "C-walk" hahaha.. you know it! shouts to him cuz you know what he was the only boy that dacned with me.. everyone else was tOo busy dealing with their freakin' issues.. albert shaking your ass does not count as dancing... just so you know.. shOot you swear i'm gonna waste my time dealing with drama at a dance.. HECK NO! but whatever.. anyways.. at the end of the day it was ehh.. the dance ended everyone left.. and uMm yah tada... done.. there ya go.. oh and uMm thanks nicholas, my precious for NOT dancing with me! you broke my heart.... =( that did not score you more precious points! but no worries you're still my precious.. alritee i think that's it for this fun filled day.. now time to watch the lakers get elliminated.....

highlight of the day:
- dancing with KING MIDAS!
- showing off my shexy dance moves! oh yeah.. you like that one huh katrina ?! hehehe by katrina i mean a different katrina from clark, not me, i am not talking to myself! hehehe

NOT so highlight of the day:
- dude, haterations, tension, BEEF?! hMm.. dude uMm okay.. not feelin'
- Oops, i accidentally bumped into you, maybe we should get in a fight now ((rolling eyes))
- boy stepping up to girls?! hMm since when ?!

person who made me smile...
- JOHN! KING MIDAS dude thanks for dancing with me! we had a good time going all around that "caretorium" of yours! hehehe.. fun stuff!
- albert.. SHAKE YOUR ASS, but SERIOUSLY watch yourself! hehehe..

"People Want Fantasy, but What They Need is Reality..."
- Lauryn Hill

kay so i'm supposed to be doing homework at the current moment cuz my away message said so.. but you know what ehh.. i'm not on homework thinking mode time right now.. it's not schOol girl katrina right now.. so i guess i'll just wait for her to roll around before i get to work.. so anyways here i am blogging cuz i'm just yah i figured i should maybe help me empty out my brain so i can "absorb" all i need to, so i can do my work and junk well hMm.. anyways what else is going on.. well today at schOol it was the usual stuff going on.. schOol is schOol what can i say.. we had a best buddies officer meeting and we decided to cancel the knott's berry farm trip due to the fact that that is the time of finals and stuff.. and it's just too much to take in and junk.. and so yah.. we decided we're just gonna go on a picnic at the park instead of go all the way to knott's berry farm.. and you know what it doesn't matter cuz it's for them anyways not for our enjoyment.. and donna, the teacher for the special ed class said that they are more excited about going to the park than going to knott's berry farm, and like i said it's for them.. so i'm coOl.. i was lOoking forward to it, only becuase i would be spending time with the people in best buddies.. kay well anyways what's going on now.. hMm.. cheer practice was okay.. it's so different with a new team.. it's like you gotta rebond and everything and i dunno everything is just so different we have a whopping 14 people in varsity! that's freakin' alot.. and i'm proud to say that during tryouts i was 2nd overall! that's out of a like a lot of people! woO hOo yay for me! 2nd shOot not bad at all.. well hMm.. so yah taht was cool to find out.. and then let's see what else is going on huh? well so i came home and i did the "routine" again.. ehehe yay i think i am getting used to this routine.. hehe.. it's fun having a nice and neat routine that will help you organize yourself.. you feel all clean and organized and what not.. dude it's been so freakin' hot around lately what's with that?! but it's okay cuz then it'll be better for me cuz i can wear shorts and skirts and my legs can hopefully turn the same shade as my dark ass arms! or wear long sleeved shirts and have my arms get lighter.. either way.. just have them the same freakin' color.. gracious.. well anyways.. what else is up..

hMm i dunno i have nothing inspirational to write down in this blog.. well okay let me reflect at my quote above said by the wonderful lauryn hill.... so yah you know it's true people always live for that fantasy in their minds, whether it be to live a wealthy luxurious life or to get with that certain someone there's always this fantasy.. but i mean just cuz you want it, it doesn't necessarily mean it's meant to be right? i'm not saying it's not okay to dream and have fantasies.. it's perfectly okay, but at the same time don't lose grasp of reality. don't forget that you still have a life to live, and sometimes letting go of fantasies will help you live a reality that could be far better than what you could ever dream of.. cuz i mean tehre are people in this world who can't seem to let go of dreams and fantasies and they keep getting stuck in the same place.. and they're never moving forward, cuz they live in a fantasy world, and you know what fantasy worlds do not exist.. so live in reality, and i bet you will get a lot farther in life, probably even surpass your dreams and fantasies... hmm.. well there you go..

kay well you know what.. dammit i was about to write something at the end of this but you know what.. toO bad i totally forgot.. been doing that a lot lately.. been wanting to write something then completely forgetting what i was supposed to write.. what's wiht that.. oh yah now i remember.. tomorrow hMm.. friday i dunno what to do yet.. so many things that are going on.. and all of them sound delicious.. for one thing there's the clark luau i'm going to be attending.. yah.. so uMm that should be interesting i dunno i have a feeling i'm not really gonna be shaking the boO-oOh-tee at this dance.. but i just wanna see what clark dances are like.. since they are like middle schOol dances and everything.. uMm hello it starts at like 3:30 and ends at like 5:30 hMm.. alrite 2 hours.. shOot that's like one butt shake.. whatever. i feel like sitting on my butt hole and watch people dance for 2 hours.. since that can also be a very entertaining experience.. and then there's healing mass and there's also the game.. hMmm let's see.. i dunno.. hMm.. we'll see huh?!

kay so let's see.. i guess you can say i'm feeling better.. i did the most awesomest thing ever so i was in the shower right.. and then all of a sudden it dawned on me, "HEY THIS IS A GREAT PLACE TO PRAY!" cuz first of all you're all natural, and there aren't really any distractions tehre.. so i decided to sit down and pray for a couple minutes.. with the water just pouring down on you it's a beautiful thing.. and prayer there is very soOthing and relaxing it was nice.. and i opened my eyes after praying and i smiled.. that's the first thing i did.. SMILE.. smiles are a wonderful thing.. people should stop wasting their time frowning and turn those frowns upside down! hehe.. so well today schOol was okay.. i was really nervous cuz i came in and found out i had a french quiz.. and it was like what hte heck ?! but luckily it was a group quiz.. so i was like woO hOo.. and then cheer practice.. i gotta remind myself.. gotta take it slow.. but anyways so then i get home and my godson is at my house again and everyone is tired so he was handed over to me for the rest of the time..and so i was just doing some homework.. and i organized all my stuff when i got home.. the usual routine.. actually NOT the usual routine.. but will be the routine.. yay for me.. i have a routine.. and then i lOoked after him for awhile.. and then i was trying to stay awake for him but i wound up drifting off to sleep.. i was watching the celtics and nets game and that was when i fell asleep.. i haven't really decided which team i liked from the two.. but it looks to me that the nets are better than the celtics.. but i dunno still undecided about which team i'm going to roOt for.. and besides maybe boston just wasn't having a very good day that day or something.. hehe.. okay but anyways.. i don't know what to do this friday.. cuz apparently there is a clark dance that i might go to.. i just wanna check out these clark dances.. cuz i mean i know they're like middle schOol dances.. but i just wanna check it out.. and then there's the game and i might watch it at hOoters, but then also there's a healing mass on friday night.. and i just don't know where to go and which one to go to.. cuz i think this healing mass is going to be awesome.. but at the same time THE GAME! ehh i dunno where ever GOD takes me i guess.. for all i know HE's gonna take me to neither right ? GOD is so unpredictable... so anyways now i'm watching the miss universe pageant and i caught a glimpse of miss philippines and she was pretty and stuff but she was real skinny.. and now i'm watching and i'm not really sure who i favor the most.. i'm lOoking into russia and india and china is very uMm chinese! hehehe.. i don't think i've rever seen a chinese delegate for these things before.. Ooh and i like venezuela too she's pretty hot also.. okay well i think i'm going to end this blog.. cuz i just don't have anything in my mind anymore.. alrite going to end this sucker now..

highlight of the day:
- babysitting my godson
- getting into a "routine" niiice

NOT so highlight of the day:
- killer heat! mayn freakin' sweating bullets at practice..yecko!

person who made me smile:
- Robert.. cuz he's my boifren! 143*!

okay.. can i say O-R-G-A-S-M !! freakin' BIBBY! dude.. that was the best feeling! to see him make that shot to win it for the KINGS! daym.. gosh daym that felt good.. it hurt last game.. but this time.. HAH! in your face! to all you laker fans! this series ends at GAME 6, trust this! series score 3-2 !!! aah.. dude i was having a bad day until now.. GOD makes people smile in the best ways =) ! all i gotta say is last time it was horry, but THIS TIME IT WAS BIBBY! BIBBY IS THE MAN! i'm gonna buy the paper tomorrow so i can rub it in someone's face when i see him! *ahem* hahaha.. okay i think i'm done... oh yah KKKKKKKKKKIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS! there now i'm done.. now excuse me while i run around naked screaming "GO KINGS!"

."In three words I can sum up everything I've learned about life: It goes on." ---Robert Frost.

okay well here i am.. i didn't go to school today in the state of that i just was not feeling going to school and seeing a bunch of people with smiles all across their faces.. i woke up today.. saw the time 6:54 and i just didn't feel like waking up from there.. what an excuse huh?! well so i spent the whole day just doing chores.. cleaning my room.. doing laundry and organizing my closet to a point that everything was color coded.. dang that was pretty exciting.. okay but anyways so now i've been going through all the "pasalubong" the "man" brought back.. yah so i was just munching around the kitchen.. and babysitting my godson.. yah well i dunno bleh.. i'm feeling dead right now.. i dunno maybe i just need to be more active in schOol, friends, and whatever else.. i need to put my heart into something.. cuz i dunno i can't even put into words what i'm feeling.. i don't even know if i'm upset or sad or mad or just okay.. i don't know what i feel yet.. maybe i just really need to get out of the house also.. cuz i think this house is evil.. and it's not safe for me to stay in this surroundings.. I WANT OUT! but anywyas.. you know what i'm not going around saying LIFE SUCKS.. cuz that's a stupid thing to say.. cuz life doesn't suck..life is a beautiful thing, cuz life is GOD's blessing and GOD's miracle.. life itself is a miracle.. it's a matter of how you wanna live your life.. and right now i'm living my life the best way i can..despite all the nastiness that is laid before me.. cuz those nastiness have a reason for being there right? so just deal with life and move on.. like the quote above says.. "it goes on." life goes on whether you want it to or not.. so you might as well make the most out of it..so i decide i'm taking myself out of this rut i'm about to get stuck in and smile my way out of it.. cuz that's the best thing i can do.. hMm.. life goes on through the trials and tribulations, through the happiness, through the tears, hMm.. i guess that's what makes life so beautiful..

some quotes i got from a friend that i am REALLY feelin.. funny how words can conform to every belief and every feeling in your mind and body, but yet you're not the ones said them...

There comes a time wen some relationshps when no matter how sincere the attempt to reconcile the differences or how strong the wish to recreate a part of the past once shared, the struggle becomes so painful that nothing else is felt and the world and all its beauty only add to the discomfort by providing cruel contrast.


WE are not evil, inadequate or imcompotent when our relationships fail. It may have been that we were simply overconfident about them, not adequately prepared for them or unrealistic in our expectations of them. NOt all relationships are right. As long as values change, insights expand, human fadcades remain impenetrable and human behaviors unpredicatable, we will make mistakes.


The very measure of a good relationship is in how much it encourages optimial intellectual, emotional n spiritual growth. So, if a relationship becomes destructive, endangers our humman dignitity, prevents us from growing, continaully depresses ande demoralizes us--and we have done everythign we can to prevent its failure-then, unless we are masochist and enjoy misery, we must eventually terminate it. We are not for everyone and everyone is not for us. The question is, "if we cannot be with another, can we at least not hurt them? can we at least, find a way to coexist?...

the saddest part when u lose someone u love is when that person keeps changing and later u wonder is that the same person i lost? maybe u lost more, maybe less, ten thousand diff things that come from the memory or imagination-and u dont know which one was which, which was tru, which was false...

i really like those two.. i'm feelin..thanks ms. kaielle for the quotes i like it.. I LIKE IT ALOT!

"you can complain cuz roses have thorns, or you can rejoice, because thorns have roses.."
- unknown

well today was hMm.. a pretty good day.. a monday with no schOol.. that's always a lot of fun.. so i wound up cleaning my room for awhile.. do the laundry time.. i figured it was about time cuz i don't have anymore underwear to wear! hahaha.. but anyways.. yah uMm after cleaning my room i went to the park to have a little memorial day BBQ.. but how come the only thing we were BBQing were little hotdogs.. yah we're a great group huh.. well there was a bunch of random people getting together today... but yah all in all it was fun.. but i was kinda tired cuz i only got like 4 hours of sleep the night before.. but anyways.. so uMm.. i got to hang out with some friends and that's always a fun thing to do.. today was also a day of realization.. i never realized how bitter i was.. and now i can say that i'm over it.. yah kinda weird how i realized i was bitter then got over it the same day.. i figured there's just not enough timein the world to be angry and bitter.. and i mean i don't like feeling that way anyways.. so why feel it?! idunno and yah my quote up there.. is true.. i guess it's in a matter of perception right.. i mean it's like looking at a glass half empty or half full type of deal..i guess with my whole bitterness attitude it's a matter of how i perceive my day to be.. if i perceive it to be a positive day or a negative one.. i'm trying to have a positive day everyday..i dunno lately i haven't been.. it's like i've been like having mood swings like never before.. i dunno i used to think i was a pretty patient person.. but now i think that patience is disengrating.. i think i need to pray more..cuz i guess i have been letting my before going to sleep prayers slip by.. cuz i've just been drifting off to sleep.. i need to repriotize my time.. and make sure to put time in for praying atleast half an hour.. well anyways but all in all today was a good day..

it's really funny how people change sometimes.. they say change is good right?! again it's a matter of the whole perception thing.. for example.. me, i know i have changed.. and to me for the better.. but someone else can think i have changed for the worse.. but also let me ask you this.. who really changed? is it the person who you claim has changed, or yourself, to the point that your perception of that person has changed due to the changes you have gone through.. hMm.. that's a thought huh.. but you know what.. it's really weird i dunno i think i'm entering a weird phase in my life right now.. and i'm scared cuz i'm not sure how i'm going to handle it.. i'm thinking about one person who has in my opinion changed.. i dunno for the worse or for the better.. i dunno if i can judge that.. all i know is.. this person is changing into someone i don't think i wanna know anymore.. but the weird thing is.. i don't really know if i ever knew this person.. cuz it always felt like this person hid something from me.. and now before i ever got to unravel that this person is changing.. changing not for himself, or not to a different person, but weirdly enough one to mimic another.. you get it ?! this person is changing to the fact that he's becoming the image of an existing human being.. i dunno it's really weird.. really weird.. hmm.. okay i think i'm going to end this blogation.. cuz i am just tired of thinking.. and actually.. i'm doing better from when i began to write this blog.. maybe i'm just not feeling well cuz i know my mom's husband is coming back from the philippines today.. =/ wish me luck guys..

highlight of the day:
- hanging out with the hO-Oh-mies! hehe
- dancing in the park

NOT so highlight of the day:
- weird thinking mode
- welcome back?! yeck..

person who made me smile:
- Gail and Freda cuz we were dancing in the park..

"if two people really love each other.. how do you know when enough is enough?! ....... NEVER."
- ( not a direct quote, but something of that nature) from the movie, THE MEXICAN
what's with me and the corny quotes lately?! hMm.. hehe

okay so my beautiful no schOol tomorrow sunday started out like this.. i went to church at 12 o'clock mass... and get this.. i wake up at a good time and get ready BEFORE joyce does! woO hOo yah and i met up with my buddy carlos to go to to mass with him so we go and we're there and it was a pretty good sermon.. and then my aunts and cousins came.. so that was cOol cuz i haven't seen them in a long while and it turns out they were going to my house after mass so i was like yay i get to hang out with them.. afterward mass carlos and i meet joyce outside the church and then we go to baskin robbins for some ice cream.. it was carlos's treat.. cuz his mom made him.. yay to carlos's mom! hehe and low and behold we see marnette working.. what a cutie patOotie! =) all up in her baskin robbins outfit and stuff.. hehehe..she served me by the way which was quite an experience afterwards we watched the KINGS game.. although they lost it was a pretty good game.. i gotta give my "props" to horry that mother fudger plays good ball.. ooh dang i sound like a baller! hahaha.. but no seriously that guy is good.. mayn that fag! he needs to go be good at some other time cuz the lakers don't deserve him.. but anyways.. moving on so carlos, joyce, and me are at my house.. and carlos and i were playing a pretty spiffy game of chess that i SHOULD have won.. but i got crazy distracted cuz of the game and stuff... so afterwards i'm yelling at the tv screen and my mom is yelling right back.. i was supposed to go out with skarlet.. brandon.. and junior and so they come to my house cuz i told them i wans't leaving my house until the game finished.. but urfz.. it did and urfz horry that dang WHORE! hehe.. jk.. but anyways so i leave my house.. carlos goes home joyce goes home and i'm with brandon skarlet and junior.. it was a pretty interesting day if i say so myself.. hehehe.. so hanging out with those three started out like this i kinda made the whole group late to the 5 o'clock movie.. so we decided first we were gonna eat.. skarlet and i decided to eat panda.. and then the boys were trying to be cute and eat something else but in the end they chose to eat panda also.. dumb boys.. and then afterwards we literally walk in and out of the mall.. but ofcourse we spend some time at pet love! the doggies are so adorable! haha.. i saw this little dog i forgot what kind it was but it was all little and you couldn't really see it's eyes.. and when it ran it would more like hop cuz it couldn't really run cuz it's legs were too tiny! aww and then i wanted really bad to pet it.. so i asked this one boy if we can take it out.. and he's all "you have to be 18." i'm like aww shOot.. and then skarlet's like "I'M 18!" but you know she's not.. hehe.. and the guy was all let me see..and she shows her driver's license although you can see on there her real age.. but the guy was nice enough to take the doggy out for us.. woO hOo omg.. so cute.. but so stinkay! so after petting the dog me and skarlet run to the bathroom with the boys behind us cuz we wanted to get thd oggy smell off of us.. and then we go to bath and body cuz we needed to smell like girlys again.. hehe pretty slick of us huh?! hehe yah i thought so, so afterwarsd we go back to mann at the exchange and we watched "the new guy" pretty stupid movie.. hehe but there were the uMm semi humorous moments.. i was laughing more at skarlet for the fact that uMm she laughed at every freakin' scene in the movie! and dang we were all loud and shOot dude.. okay first off you know those phrases i often use with the words.. "balls, dick, etc. etc.." well so i mean i forget that people might think i'm a big perverted freak for it and i said it.. and then all of a sudden everybody in the freakin' theatre heard me and they start laughing at me.. and i was just like oh shOot! like everyone repeated what i said and laughed at me.. and i was turning all red.. serious! i felt my face flush! that's a freakin' first! mayn and dude we were so loud in the theatre.. well atleast skarlet was that when i left i started apologizing to everyone who watched the movie.. hehe yah see what a good samaritan i am.. keep in mind this whole day i do not have contacts or glasses on.. hehe. yah it was pretty fantastic.. but no umM.. so i left the theatre.. and i coulda sworn i saw an ex-boyfriend of mine but i didn't wanna just be like staring at him and go up to him and stare and see if it was really him.. and i mean i figured if it was him he wouldn't be shy to say what's up to me and stuff.. but dang hMm i wonder if it was him.. but anywys moving on.. so afterwards we all decide to go to mcdonald's and the nice boy brandon treated me out! hahaha he was my slave for the day! hahaha.. yup.. shOot.. he did all my "chores" for me.. hehe yes that's what boys are supposed to do ! hahaha jk! but anyways afterwards we shared a pretty umm interesting/good convo at mcdonald's.. hehe and dude skarlet and i were pretty loud and stuff.. and surprisingly mcdonald's was the only place that told us to shut up! hahaha.. dang.. and then afterwards skarlet drops me off and here i am blogging.. hMm what's gonna happen tomorrow a supposed "picnic" hahaha.. is supposed to take place. hMm.. we'll see about that one.. dude this group was really fun to hang out with.. we laughed every freakin' minute.. hehe.. laughing non stop! and laughing is good for the abs! haha.. alrite i think i'm done blogging now.. so uMm.. hopefully this blog wasn't toO long tor people to read.. dang i need to write less huh?! hehe.. alrite that's it.. g'bye! hahaha

highlight of the day:
- hanging out with skarlet, brandon, and junior
- seeing "my baby" hahaha, carlos you know who i'm talking about!
- playing chess/ hanging out with carlos!
- all the laughing action that was going on!
- having brandon for a slave! heck yah! haha

NOT so highlight of the day:
- freakin' HORRY that freakin' guy! mayn!
- having people hear my "speech" and think i'm some big perverted freak!

person who made smile..
- marnette in her crazy baskin robbins uniform! hehe she even tOok a break just cuz we were there! aww..i love her!