let's go get our asses kicked by love
-- little boy from Love Actually

okay so today i have the Montrose Parade and i also have Rel's funeral to attend to. i'm not feeling so hot though... my nose is getting really stuffed, i'm woozy, and my throat hurts, and i sound horrible. i'm not gonna feel like talking much today. but anyways i'm not really sure how the Montrose parade is gonna go. cuz we didn't practice much, cuz people don't really like cooperating during practice so it's kind of hard to practice anything, and get anything done. but that's another story. but anyways, i'm kind of scared to go to Rel's funeral.. i don't know it's like i wanted to lie to myself all this time that maybe, just maybe it wasn't him.. and i know that's stupid of me to do cuz i mean i'm 100% sure it's him.. it's just you wish it wasn't.. something deep within yourself wishes that maybe it's not that person in the casket.. ehh i don't know. i'm still so sensitive about the subject i hate it. anytime i talk about him or people talk about him around me it's like i get this lump in my throat and i have to fight tears from coming down my eyes. it was horrible, cuz during 3rd period our principal was making an announcement about it on the speaker and i was trying so hard not to cry but i couldn't help it and then the tears just started coming down and it was hard to stop them from coming.. and then later that day yelena, me, and robin were all talking and we were just talking about anything and everything and the subject of rel happen to come up and then i started crying again. it's horrible how i am still sensitive about the subject.. it's like dude i wish i can just get over it already! argh.

anyways, i watched phantom of the opera thursday night and it was freakin' beautiful! i loved it so much! gosh it was sooo beautiful! thanks to robert for driving and stuff.. cuz i really didn't want to drive... but anyways, after phantom of the opera me, yelena, tricia, anna, and robert all went to denny's to eat some food.. yelena didn't want to eat at china town because she didn't want to eat shrimp with heads on them! hahha oh gosh this girl.. but yeah so we didn't eat there.. we ate at denny's.. so we chilled and talked.. freak we talked ALOT! we came to denny's at like 10:30pm and then when we left it was already 1:30am! 3 hours sitting around talking.. the people there must have been like omgosh get the heck out of here already! it was great talking though.. and robert answering our question about guys and stuff.. good stuff. it was a good night. then i drove home only to find out my mom had a bad spill that night. she fainted and she hit her head on her bed. like the wooden part of her bed, cuz her bed is huge and she hit her head on the bottom part of it and she had to get stitches on her head. so she was crying a lot and stuff cuz she was experiencing a lot of pain. i felt horrible that i couldn't be there, and i didn't know that it happened since i was at the play. and don't worry guys she's feeling a lot better now.

well i'm gonna get going. i have to shower and what not. i'm supposed to get my car back today.. gosh i hope it's today... *crossing fingers* but we'll see. alrite see you guys later.

There are easier things in life than finding a good man...nailing jell-o to a tree, for instance.
-- this site.. credit to lucy goosey for the site

someone stop me.. cuz i'm starting to become a shop-a-holic!! not good at all.. it's not good to have the mall right there and not be so out of the way.. well i mean i know you guys are thinking when you were in gdale you lived near the mall too, but i mean here i don't have to see people.. and at this mall they have hollister & co... and i still REALLY need to buy this one sweater there, but they currently don't have it in stock.. so i must keep going back until they do! i'm going insane.. =/ i'm worried.. don't they have meetings for this kind of stuff.. but yeah i swear after i buy the one sweater they have i'm straight.. i'm done! well anyways, today was an okay day.. nothing overly interesting happened.. well what else is new.. that's what i always say.. omgosh i saw the best bumper sticker today when i was driving to the mall and i mean it came like perfect timing ever.. cuz i don't know i was moody the whole day really.. cuz i'm sick and the fact that my nose tickles and stuff.. and the sneezes wouldn't come out just made me have a wretched mood the whole day.. and then when i saw the bumper sticker it was like.. how can you NOT smile after reading that.. it said, "SMiLE your mom CHOSE LiFE! dude.. i wanted to like roll down my windows and tell the lady that i love the bumper sticker on her car.. but i can't roll down the passengar side window on the honda.. haha daym the honda! i miss my car.

dude it's the greatest thing.. we have christmas decorations out front! it's great! we have three of those lit up reindeer! yep THREE! and they move and stuff! it's great! i was really excited when my uncle called me outside to look at them! i was so excited.. and that's not the only thing we have.. we have this like blow up santa thing up front too! it's great! i feel all into christmas now and i think we're putting up christmas lights today. the first time celebrating christmas at this house.. now i'm getting excited. did i tell you guys my mom bought a christmas tree.. like a REAL one.. first time ever.. and it smells so good to go downstairs or to come into the house.. cuz you can just smell the evergreen scent! and dude it's HUGE! they had to cut the top of it cuz it didn't fit.. so they had to cut a bit of it off.. my mom got a little carried away. but anyways... christmas is up in coming and for some reason i'm getting really excited now! =)

here's the wishlist:
christmas wishlist: (done preferably alongside someone)
1. go see the light festival at Griffith Park.
2. walk around and look at christmas lights in my neighborhood.
3. walk around glendale (up at the mtns.) looking at christmas lights.
4. go to disneyland during christmas.
5. go sit on santa's lap and tell him what i want for christmas.
6. take a picture with santa.
7. make a gingerbread house.
8. eat candy canes.
9. put up christmas lights.
10. get one of those lit up reindeer (preferably the one that moves)
11. go to the zoo and see ACTUAL reindeers!
12. get drunk with lucy! haha!

anyone want to fulfill some of my wishes?

say cheese!

the BiG group picture. i love it!!!


varsity cheer! (funny)


varsity cheer! a more serious one

enjoy.. i'll do some blogging later...

Carrie: Think about it. If you are single, after graduation there isn't one occasion where people celebrate you. ... Hallmark doesn't make a "congratulations, you didn't marry the wrong guy" card. And where's the flatware for going on vacation alone?
-- Sex and the City

oh wow i love that show! it's freakin' great! but anyways, so today i was supposed to go help out HOJ for a retreat that they are giving, but i'm not there. reason 1: i woke up late. which was expected, hence the reason why i left the signs with charles. reason 2: by the time i did wake up i realized that i have no car! i returned my rent a car on saturday and it completely slipped my mind that i no longer have an automobile at the moment. so i'm really sorry guys.

so let's see... let's rundown what's been happening lately.. i won't get into the specifics cuz the specifics aren't pretty haha.. friday was what i call interesting remind me never to drink that much again.. fudge i was hoping i'd be a tad bit nicer than my usual mean ass self,. but fudge i just become meaner. they say drinking brings out the true you since it takes away all your inhibitions and nothing is holding you back from releasing the real you. hence maybe the nice people become a bit more mean because they aren't really as nice as they seem.. but with me since i'm mean up front.. i was hoping maybe the niceness would be brought out of me, but that was just not the case.. i proved to be the female dog that i am. gosh darn. no hope for me anymore. i would like to apologize for anyone that got bashed when i was not at my best state of mind. that wasn't very nice of me, and i swear i'm very nice usually. hahaha! well maybe not a lot nicer, but i mean nicer than that night. haha it was fun though! and to the friends thanks for lookin' out and thanks for being there in my moment of being a complete spazz. like i said your real friends are the ones that will hold your hair back when you need it! ; )
- i'm gonna sue your fat ass!
- you're so nice and to think we were going to steal your purse!
- aww you like ____ . i'm so sorry. so sorry that he likes me!
- you need to get more muscles before you wear that shirt.
hahaha! holy crap i'm so sorry! hahaha! fudge. i need to bring like duct tape to shut my daym mouth!

saturday was fun! i had a freakin' hilarious conversation with a friend of mine online. it was good stuff... it's nice talking to friends that you may have not conversed with in quite awhile and when you do you find yourself laughing your ass and feeling like you've never stopped talking to them. i love that crap. so anyways at about 4 o'clock charles came and picked me up along side freda and leah and we went to my family party in n.hollywood. it was my cousin jeff's 23rd bday. fudge my cousins are getting old. but anyway, so after some good eating we all went to soem party in west co. and we had a good time! met some people that i've been very interesting in meeting. putting the stories with the faces....haha yesiree bob. and uhh yeah freda.. uhhhh yeah! no! hahahaha you know what i'm talking about i'm sure! ; ) hahhaa! after the party we all just hung out at kris's house and then we left at around 2.30am, and i was dropped off. thank you charles for driving so much that day! it feels good to be chaperoned once in awhile!

and to X i'm always here, who ever you are. i honestly have no idea who you are, and if i ever gave you a reason to think i'm not going to be here for you. i'm really sorry, and i'm sure i didn't mean it the way it came out. i'm always going to be here for anyone who needs me... i'm only a phone call away. i'm sure you have my #... don't ever hesitate to call me. like i said, i'll be here for anyone who might need me.